How To Handle Chronic Complainers
Sherri Kruger | Dumb Little Man
Know any chronic complainers? You may want to pass this on to them … and if it’s you, read on.
I think it’s natural for people to complain. Everyday we’re faced with a lot of reasons to complain: we’re not tall enough, we don’t have the latest and greatest, it’s too hot, it’s too cold, they get everything handed to them, they shouldn’t be doing this they should be doing that, etc.
Having the occasional complaint is fine. To expect a life without complaining (by you or others) is unrealistic.
Why we complain and what we can do about it:
“Life’s not fair”
I think most of us complain because we feel things are unfair and out of our control. Why do they have so much when I have nothing? I’ve worked just as hard, saved harder and I still don’t have as much to show for it. It’s just not fair.
Some people are just genuinely unhappy. They can’t find joy in any aspect of their life. Genuinely unhappy people take to complaining to express their dissatisfaction with their life and in many situations it’s used as a coping mechanism as well.
Most times people won’t admit to this as it’s a rather unbecoming trait. They may also not admit to it because they truly don’t recognize it as jealousy. This ties in with the first point of life not being fair. The emotion that can come out of that is jealousy. When you wish you had the new car, or the new job or the high salary there is a tendency to complain, either that the other people are getting this or that you’re not.
Lack of empathy
A lot of times we complain because we lack empathy for others. Think about this: You complain that someone isn’t doing something “right”, they should be doing it this way because that’s what we would do if we were in that position. When we lack empathy we aren’t able to fully put yourself in the other persons place. We don’t know the thoughts going through their head or what other complexities they are facing in their lives at that moment.