Excelle

While these are 'tried and true' rules of thumb, this one gets the thumbs down from me. We need to stop pretending to be robots at work and be who we are. Being who you are is not the same as preaching or persuading, however. I would agree that a soapbox stance is not ok, but please, is the kind of corporate mentality that really needs to change.

The older I get ...The less I talk. Only if asked for my opinion do I give it ...and I can get quit preachy, so be warned.

Woman are a special breed. We enjoy talking about just about anything. It is how we learn and grow. I am one who enjoys an enviroment that allows openness to discuss all topics. I do agree, however, that you definitely have to use your senses and be aware of others feelings toward topics. If there is emotional responses to any intro to a topic, shut it down. Don't continue with the conversation. Continuing with a topic that is unwelcome can and very well will reflect on you. If you do choose to continue be very willing to be open and accepting to others differing opions. After all, they are entitled to them...

I believe that there are always exceptions to written rules. I managed an office once that contained only three people: the physician, the medical assistant and myself. The physician I worked for was overcoming a drug addition and his father was a minister. He openly talked about it and since I was a youth minister , it was really nice to keep my bible on my desk and have time off during the week to assist my pastor with holy communion to the sick and shut in. We shared our life I mean really shared. When my now exhusband pulled a gun on me and I needed to find a new apartment, I was able to do it on company's time so that he would not know. If we did not have that type of relationship, it would have been hard to explain,hard to get time off with pay, as well as not having it affect my career. These rules are great and should be observed with any new job. Once you have been there a while, you will be able to determine if you should strictly follow them or allow yourself to bend them a little. I have been a state employee and I have worked in family bussinesses. It's all about the environment.

I'm not feeling this article at all! Dana_B is right on the money when she says it depends on the environment. I work in academia (student affairs for a major university to be exact), otherwise known as the land of the liberals. We are all liberal to mildly conservative, Catholic to Agnostic. We never have a problem discussing religion or politics and enjoy the discussions. Several of us have potty mouths and most medical problems are no secret. We're a close knit group and it's part of the reason we all love our jobs!

I've been in environments where I was scared to tell even my supervisor that I had to take a day off because I have fibroid tumors and I thought I was bleeding to death. If I was still there, I'd have to hide my Obama button because it would piss off a co-worker. Those places suck because they are full of intolerant people. I think that's really the key.

If you work with intolerant people, God (or Buddha, or the little Mr. Potato Head on your dashboard, whatever) help you. Tolerant, open minded people, will respect your pro life views even if they are pro choice. Will share with you how they got through a close family members death when you're going through something similar. Will tell you that birth control saved them when they were diagnosed with fibroids. Respect that you grew up Baptist and have no clue who the patron saint of tax collectors is (it's Matthew, by the way and I learned it from a co-worker).

I recognize that not everyone is in a work environment where they have the freedom to express themselves. I'm very fortunate that I am. Here is my rule for those who work in wonderful (and not so wonderful) places:

Do not be so rigid and closed minded that you can not listen to another intelligent person, learn from them, respectfully disagree if necessary and speak to them with a smile on your face at the next meeting.

Nobody has to be a complete open book at work, but there are times when you should simply be yourself. You know when you're about to cross the line: the little person in your head says "Maybe you shouldn't say that."

If none of this makes sense to you, you're better off just staying quiet.

I think it totally depends on the environment...me, I'm not one to speak of my financial or sex life, my religion, politics, etc. But, if the topics come up, I'm open to the light conversation that happens most of the time. I wouldn't be describing any of them in intricate detail, but it's natural that these topics will come up. I'm honest about these things, but not to the point of telling my life story them. There's a good middle ground that can be followed instead of shutting down whenever your co-workers/superiors/business associates bring it up - and they will!

I agree, TallAnna - there still should be some sort of line, which I would think would run along the lines 'common sense', but we've all seen people do things which common sense should have prevented! ;) For those, I don't know if written rules would help - some people like to learn things the hard way...

It's funny how many of these articles that seem to be straight out of the '80s or '90s, yet supposedly written recently - I know I've read these rules in an article over a decade ago, this is just recycled material...
I've conducted and participated in many 'team building' exercises designed specifically for people who work together to get to know each other better and on a more personal level. This personal bonding helps people to work together better professionally. There are companies out there that host team-building events for other companies to better their management, so I know it's not an isolated thing, either. Anyway, sometimes when getting to know people better they'll reveal facts about themselves, like that they're religious, or what their political choice is, etc. It's never caused any arguments to break out - they are revealing a part of who they are. Some people are very involved in their church, so they can't talk about their personal lives without mentioning religion. Should they be forced to sit there and not say anything or speak in code? If they're not proselytizing, I don't see a problem with it.