Excelle

Ettenyl you are right WE SHOULD ALL try to educate ourselves about other peoples races and cultural backgrounds. For me, everything that you posted I have either learned about in jr. high, high school or on my own.

Fun note for you did you know Africans(Yorubans) were actually the first peoples to discover the Americas not the European. See "They came Before Columbus" wonderful book by a half black/half white German by the name of Von (omg,I can't remember his name. Sorry) Anyways look it up I think you would enjoy that.

But, back to the topic. Because of how I was treated it never interfered with how I treated other people or kept me from having friends that are black/African American. And actually one of closest friends is black. And I am sorry, but no matter what has happened you , me, others, of people of color we should not treat anyone differently. The difference is the authors career. Is that she is a Family Therapist which to me is like a doctor. Even more so because she is dealing with people's mental and emotional health and well being. People in that profession have an obligation to separate those things. If a black person and a white person are sent to a therapist with the same infliction and a white doctor says "You know, I can't treat that black person the same as the white, because they are different" then that would be racist. It is same no matter how you look at it. But like I said and I still believe that the comment I pointed out is wrong and an opinon not fact, and was insensitive to the women of other races on this network.
I appreciate even love the fact to know what different cultures and races believe (see my post on "Superstitions"). Education of ones self is the only why to move past all this stuff. I want to know what makes us the same, I know what makes us different.

Slavery existed for thousands of years before the Africans were ever brought to the states. I am not trying to belittle what happened here in America. All those happened they are real and they are atrocities that should be acknowledged.

Hundreds of years of tyranny of the Irish by the British still exist today. British lords took and raped Irish women on their wedding nights. It was there right by law under the king. The Irish lived in complete poverty under the rule, thousands died of starvation, and when they came to America they faced racism for many years.
Again American Indians went through the EXACT same thing as black slaves. Except entire tribes have been wiped out.At one point traders offered bounties of ten and five dollars for the scalps of women and children. Not slaves, just the scalps.(In order to retrieve a scalp you had to kill that person). Millions of men women and children slaughtered......EXTINCT. For what...some buffalo hides and the land.
Hilter massacred millions of Jews, millions! In gas chambers, concentration camps, mass graves, starvation, systematic torture, and scientific research. Two examples : tortured one twin to see if the other would feel it. Would cut open pregnant women while they were alive, NO ANESTHESIA and torture their babies still attached to the cord.(If you want proof of that there is actually a movie out there of Nazi film footage that shows all of this) .

So there are people, races, cultures , whatever who have gone through the same thing as African Americans. African American are not alone. And I say this with all the respect in the world. You are not alone.

I challenge EVERYONE on here.....EVERYONE that feels anything of this nature passionately. Go out and find one, hell two other culturls or races and study them. And you will see the similarities. If not the exact same story. Take that challenge and I guarantee you it will change you.

"Blacks, more than any other group, express the strongest confidence in the institution and value of marriage."

I am sorry. But I truly believe that this part of her list is incorrect and is more opinion than fact. I agree with april256 and tgw. I am half mexican/half irish descent. My mexican grandparents were put on the back of the bus same as blacks. As the Americas were first being colonized my indian ancestors were enslaved just the same but worse I think because they have all but been complete wiped out. I suffered reverse racism almost my entire life. Wasn't mexican so latinos and hispanics didn't like me and I was half white and the blacks didn't like me(and what I mean by didn't like me was not just teasing but racial slurs I will not say and beatings to the point I would not go to school). I understand wanting to celebrate your culture. But I think the real problem is that WE ALL are still focusing in on the differences and holding on to past. The institution of marriage is valved by all who value marriage. I do not think it is a race thing. To make a comment like that knowing that women of other races will read it is a little harsh. And I can see why some people would be offended. I know I am.Especially her being a relationship therapist.Does that mean she treats couples of different races differently then she does black couples?These are things a comment like that make me wonder.She proably doesn't but to be fair that is the way it comes off.
I agree it does get to a point were even your race doesn't matter but your sex and that why we are all here for the support, empowerment of being women not a black woman or mexican woman or white woman but women. These are women's issues. If I am wrong I am wrong. But we should not celebrate things like marriage differently due to race. Marriages up and downs are the same for whoever you are.
Ladies I commend you on your opinions. We can learn from everyone who gets on here.

I am new to the discussion and I am an African American women that was born in the South but reared in the West (CA). My mother picked cotton and gave birth to me in my grandmother's shack. So I appreciate the focus on my history and and the analysis of the Black family. I happen to be happily married and have two children and we live rather well. I will say that as much as we seek to remember and celebrate our freedom, we should also seek to celebrate the achievements of other cultures as well. I too have often wondered how fair it was to not celebrate the Ameican Indian heritage for a full month or the Irish settlers that came over. I agree that I would be offended if there was a White American month that was celebrated. While I have lived through times of racism and bigotry, I have also witness reverse discrimination. It saddens the heart to see either. For me it comes down to celebrating God's people and that is where the playing field is leveled. At the end of our lives He will not look at our race or color but what we did to bring our friends, family, neighbors and the lonely stranger to Him. Continue to be blessed ladies and let your words, thoughts and deeds bless others. Thanks for the artcles, the responses and the opportunity to share honestly.

T-Dubb

Well put, TallAnna. This article celebrates marriage of all kinds through the lens of one of the many groups that make up the American fabric.

Don't missunderstand I do think they have a real issue that should be addressed - but in my opinion it has just gone a bit too far. We cannot use indian tribe names for football, we have a month celebration for black people, when do we celebrate life in general. Who cares what nationality you are - YOUR AN AMERICAN - your free - lets celebrate that! What about the pain we endured fighting with England, France and Mexico? Are we to forget the Revelutionary war or Mexico war, or the war with France - I am not asking them for extras. Hell we even pay France for the burial area of the American dead when we SAVED them from the Nazi's - hello!!

april256, You obviously no nothing about the black community. You completely missed the point of the article. GET OVER yourself.

Crystal, I love the tips you provide for how we can all support healthy & strong relationships. They could really apply to any person in any stage of a committed relationship. Thanks for the empowering reminders!