Excelle

I would love to be able to participate...but unfortunately could not.

DianaW says ...

I wish they'd gather together and explain to the idiots who are storming into Churches that such actions are detrimental to their cause.

Amen!

I personally don't know of anyone who participated.

Sorry everyone, I'm a ditz. Never heard of this practice before but am headed there to read about it after I hit the submit button. I would like to know more also about what Diana referred to about storming churches? If you don't want to post it here, please feel free to send me some links or something privately. I'm not on a lot during the daytime (most days anyway) because I teach my son. So I don't get caught up until the evening time. Will you or Jean B. email me to let me know what you're talking about?

Thanks ladies. I'm headed now to read at the links you provided, Anna.

Touchy, touchy subject but a great one.

I feel that minority groups and any group or segment of the population who feel they are being discriminated against, takes a stand such as this.  There have been times when African Americans decided not to shop or buy gas to prove how their dollars would be missed and how much they contribute to society, then Hispanics did something similar last year. 

I'm not an activist so I don't have the mind of an activist but I THINK people are crying out for acceptance and to be recognized for who they are.  People no longer want to be "in the closet" or discriminated against because of skin color or language barriers.  Everyone wants to be wanted and to be accepted. 

From my angle, I sympathize (not pity and absence of all judgement) with those who feel alone, left out, discriminated against, judged and unwanted.  When we stand in the mirror naked, we're all the same (men are men and women are women), when we bleed, all of our blood is red, when we shop, all of our dollars are green. 

Again, I'm not an activist and don't have the mind of an activist, but at the core of it all, we're all human.

If we have an activist here, or a gay or lesbian, please shed some light on it for us.  Forgive me if gay or lesbian is politically incorrect and please correct me so that I may address you correctly.

Blessings,

~Angie

Angie: Interesting? I've been called worse, lol!!

Thank you!! Big hugs!

ninaeve says ...

I believe gay people or same sex relationships should be allowed the same rights as do hetersexuals. The only thing I do not promote is displaying openly public love make out scenes - same for hetersexuals.  (everyone should not know what you do whether gay or straight)...

Gay people should be able to get married and raise children.  As long as they are in a healthy environment - anotherwards, a safe invironment.  I have friends who are gay and they are good people and deserve to be able to marry and do so called 'normal' things...

 

I definitely agree with you on the makeout scenes no matter the sexual preference.

I don't want to cause friction here, but since others who feel differently than I do have voiced their opinions, while I respect their opinions, I hope mine is respected as well.

I have nothing against gay couples or unmarried heterosexual couples. But my opinion is that the benefits of a married heterosexual couple should not be afforded to gay couples or unmarried heterosexuals OR the people who feel differently than I do. I could not care less about their sexual preferences or being unmarried and living together. They're citizens just like others. They can have their own sexual preference or living arrangements. But it is my opinion that I uphold the sanctity of marriage and marriage occurs between a man and a woman. Period. If I were to say otherwise would be a lie. For me to believe they deserve all the same benefits as a married heterosexual couple, it goes completely against my own beliefs.

I hope no one holds that against me, but if you do, there's nothing I can do about it. I'm merely voicing my opinion here as others who think differently have done. I am not trying to be offensive.

Perhaps one day I may change my mind. I don't foresee it, but I never say never.

Respectfully,

Marie

By legitimate, I'm assuming you're asking me about the legality of a marriage.

So on that note, what I consider a legal marriage is when a man and a woman obtain the legal necessary papers to marry (marriage license is what it's called in my state.) They should appear before witnesses as prescribed by laws in most states. And the ceremony should be officiated by a preacher, a priest, an ordained minister, or an individual who has the legal power bestowed upon them to officiate a marriage ceremony (such as a judge.) As far as locale, it does not necessarily have to be done in a church. It could be done in their own back yard,  the man and woman taking vows in front of their witnesses officiated by a legally empowered individual to perform the ceremony, and yes, in the presence of God, which by my belief, in the presence of God would be anywhere.

I just have to put my 2 cents in on this one...

Not to knock anyone's religous beleifs, but is marriage really sacred to most people anymore?  and the rights afforded to married couples should be given to all couples raising families together regardless of sexual preference.  Marriage in the sense of the rights that are afforded such as tax breaks have absolutely no connection with the spiritual or relgious aspect of marriage.  This country is about giving all of it's citizens rights.  I can understand preists refusing to marry gay couples, but I can support any judicial system that denies it because again we blur the lines of church and state.  If marraige is a "religous" agreement then it should not be something done in the court...period.  However, because it is done in the court system and all licenses whether a preist or whatever religous figure oversees the vows a license is still processed through a clerk's office then it is a legal agreement.  If we are to say that gay couples should not be married based on religous beleifs then how can we allow people of different religons to marry.  This country is great because people are free to voice there opinion, not because people's opinions rule the country.  Just to give an example to my perspective:  if I was a practicing Budhist and my fiance (a man) was a practicing Budhist, we can go to the court house and get married, but the Catholic preist is not going to marry us.  So what is the difference if my fiance is a women?  There shouldn't be one.  Anyone who wants to commit to another person that is of age and sound mind should be encouraged to do so.  Espicially in todays times where STD's claim so many lives.  All people should be encouraged to commit for a lifetime to one partner not prevented, or discouraged from doing so.  Furthermore, why should the father of my children if we don't beleive in the religous aspects of marriage be forced to marry so we can be afforded the same benefits as other families.  If I don't beleive in marriage, but beleive in my family, why should I have to marry to pay taxes as a family instead of as an individual.  I think maybe a family Agreement should be designed and we should not call it a marriage at all in the court system, just call a Life Long Co-Habitation or Family Agreement where people can be afforded the same rights as married heterosexual couples...what's so wrong with that?

Marie, I hope you don't feel that I was arguing with you or attacking you with my thoughts and questions.  It isn't that I am trying to change your mind or even telling you that you are wrong.  That is not my place.  I just find it interesting when I run in to people with differing beliefs than I have and like to discuss and learn their reasons and such.  I like to understand, that is all I was trying to do.

This is such a personal topic; like matters of religious belief, definitions of marriage and family seem to be highly charged emotionally. It is also a topic that I frequently pose in a slightly different form to my cultural anthropology students when we study family, kinship, and marriage cross-culturally. Trying to find a universal definition of family or marriage that fits all cultures and which doesn't simply reflect one's own cultural definitions or personal biases can be difficult at best.

As a woman in a long-term committed lesbian relationship, I find myself conflicted about my feelings about marriage. I was married previously (20 years to my second husband and 6+ to my first). Currently, my partner of 10 years and I enjoy basically none of the legal rights that were afforded me when I was legally married. Ironically, the only time that I have really felt that I was in a relationship that was right for me and that was truly a union has been these past 10 years with my female partner. That has little to do with social or cultural acceptance of our relationship and more to do with this relationship being right for me and for her. My heterosexual marriages just never felt right somehow, in spite of the love I felt for my husband (and that was true in both cases) or the sense of commitment that I felt when going into the marriage. Being raised in the Midwest and raised and educated in the Catholic Church, I had no vocabulary for or understanding of that feeling that something just wasn't quite right until after my second divorce. After falling in love with my partner, it all started to make sense.

Still, probably because of the way I was raised and the lack of acceptance in our culture (which includes our laws) for gay marriage, or perhaps because I have been twice divorced and don't want to make it thrice, I have avoided referring to my current relationship as a "marriage." After all, we don't have the legal rights that marriage brings, and legal rights are what marriage has traditionally been about in our culture. Marriage as a love relationship has only been prevalent in our country since the 19th c. Even today, marriage is primarily a legal contract which defines the rights and responsibilities of each partner. Love is frequently (perhaps most often, one would hope) a major reason that two people marry, but the legitimization of the relationship generally is also (or sometimes instead) a major factor for marriage in America.

Yes, I would like for others to see my relationship with my partner as legitimate, but this time, that is not AS necessary because I KNOW this relationship is right for me. Tax advantages, social acceptance, and a guarantee that no one will question my partner's right to a say in my medical care or to inherit without me having to get a lawyer to put it in writing, and the assurance that my wishes will be considered in regard to her care would make life much easier for us. They aren't a requirement, though, for us to identify as a couple, committed to a heretofore life-long relationship based on love, mutual attraction, and respect.

I don't know if our relationship will be legitimized in our lifetime, at least in regard to the law, but I do know that it is legitimate in our eyes and in the eyes of those who care about us most.

I honestly didnt know about that day but now that i do i will support it as much as i can. When i was in high school i always participated in the day of silence to support my gay friends. i loved that day and i did it faithfully for 3 yrs since i found out about it in 10th grade but in 12th grade i was in my last class of the day and this witch got an attitude with me because i wouldnt talk. i ended up breaking the silence to cus her out and to tell her that she can be apart of all those ignorant people who see things one way but i believe every person has their own rights and you should support them no matter what they believe. i got in trouble and had to sit in the hall for awhile but it was worth it cus i hate when people cant support others and their beliefs. like alot of people dont like to support the fact that my husband in an atheist and im a christian. i dont like it but i dont judge him because i love him and support his beliefs i just wont let him bring me down. So basically i am a very big supporter of the gay community and am very proud of the ones who arent afraid to show it. shoot i wont even go to straight clubs. if i go out other than a resturant the only club i go to is gay clubs because they are the best ones out there. no place can top them. If you havent gone to one i would suggest going soon.

I am a straight ally for our LGBT employee networking group at work; we have found that having straight employees advocate for equal treatment is very effective.

I recently married but prior to that had my husband listed as my domestic partner on corporate benefits, which gave me an interesting insight into the financial and other disparities between straight and LGBT employees.  For example, when he was severely injured and required surgery, my manager would not cooperate in obtaining intermittent FMLA leave so that I could care for him in the mornings before going into work.  We married two weeks ago and I am looking forward to the "raise" by no longer having taxes taken out of the imputed benefit amount.

And I appreciate the fact that we could legally marry wherever we chose, while many devoted couples do not have this choice.